Thank you Utah.

We move in exactly one week.  I am very excited to get to California and begin our new lives there, I am craving to feel settled somewhere.  This entire past year I didn't know how long we were going to live in Orem and what the "plan" was.  I'm excited to have a routine and make friends, but I'm so grateful for this move.  There were so many things I learned this past year that have deeply changed me.  

Thank you Utah...

-for the Provo temple that was my sanctuary and kept me afloat.

-for the beautiful mountains and getting to experience all 4 seasons- skip Winter please. (I've never drank so much Hot Chocolate in my life)

-for humbling me.

-for stretching me way out of my comfort zone.

-for bringing my family even closer.

-for helping me to slow down and be more present for my kids.

-for teaching me to be more tolerant and loving towards others.

-for seeing that there is good in all situations.

-for getting to live close to Matt's family, love them.  Good times, good times.

Until we meet again.

Kindergarten Grad

 Kalli Faith has graduated from Kindergarten!  All the Kindergarteners in her school sang several songs, it was really cute.  One boy in the front was so animated, it was like he was on Broadway- I was trying to keep my eye on Kalli, but I was very distracted =)  I am so proud of this little girl, she did great for her first year of school.

Three Kindergarten graduations down and only one more to go, I never thought this would make me feel sad, but it does.

                                                       Keia's Kindergarten Graduation

                                                       Mattix's Kindergarten Graduation

Few Gems from Jody Moore

Feedback

This is Tara Mohr, I have learned many insights from her.  I loved an essay she wrote and wanted to share a thought that struck me.

She says, "Feedback doesn't tell you about yourself.  It tells you about the person giving the feedback.  When we look at praise and criticism as information about the people giving it, we tend to get really curious about the feedback, rather than dejected or defensive."

I loved this concept! I tell my kids all the time to be Brave.  I just love that word and everything it represents.  However, will my girls especially, be brave?  Or will they worry that they won't fit in or be likable by others?  We will not please everyone, that isn't the point.  We are meant to follow what feels right to us deep in our cores and what we feel drawn to, and not let others "thoughts and opinions" stand in our way.

"Remember that all distinctive work is going to bring both praise and criticism.  Your boldest and best work is likely going to be adored by some people and strongly disliked by others.  Period.  No need to fix or change that- you have your audience, and it's NOT everyone."

Goin goin, back to back to, Cali Cali...

No, you don't need to adjust your eyes, you read that right, we are moving BACK to California.  It will be almost exactly a year we were in Utah by the time we move.  What about the house we bought, you ask?  We let it go.  Matt came home one evening and at the dinner table with the kiddies, said that his company would be opening an office in Southern California- what did we think?  I started to cry tears into my chicken- what just happened?  This move to Utah was so emotionally hard.  I was just starting to adjust to living here and we are moving back?!  I had way too many emotions at that table.  Why would God lead us here if we are only going back?  There are too many answers to that question, because I know there were lessons I needed to learn here that I could of and would not of learned in my comfort zone San Diego.  There are still some unanswered questions about our move back, I still don't know all the details and how it is all going to come together, however I do KNOW it will.  I know God has a plan for me and my family, I am along for the ride.  I loved what Al Carraway said in one of her blog posts- (just pretend that it is me saying it):

I wish I could just yell to myself in the past, “YOU’LL BE ALL RIGHT! YOUR LIFE TURNS OUT AWESOME!” But of course it turns out awesome, because that’s what God will always do for us. We may not have all the answers we want about our future, but we know enough: we are led by an all powerful, all loving God.

So now, we do the only things we know how to do. Keep going. Keep trusting Him. See where the Spirit will lead us next. See what lessons we’ll learn, the experiences we’ll have, the people we’ll meet, the states we’ll live in, the talents we’ll develop, the trials we’ll conquer. Try not to yell at God when things don’t make sense and when they are so hard. Stay patient and faithful and allow life to unfold the way He would have it. 

You may not have gone where you had in mind, but you will end up where you need to be with better blessings. Never let a change of course take away from the unchangeable truth that God is taking care of you. Because you will never be asked to do something that would not be for the absolute best for you.

I love that last part, I may not have gone where I had in mind (Utah), but I'll end up where I need to be with better blessings (California, for now).  I woke up the next day after Matt had announced that at dinner.  I smiled in bed and said YES, of course I want to be back in California and was sooo happy at the opportunity.  I'm coming back sunshine and beach- we missed each other!

Present

A few days ago the weather was 70 degrees, so beautiful.  I sent Kalli and Kori out in our back to paint some pictures.  It started out with paint on the paper and turned into paint on their hands, feet, and all over the cement.  Kori made about 50 requests for "mo wa wa" just to be poured out on him instead of to clean the brushes.  I sat at the window and watched my two youngest so happy to feel so free.  Free to paint whatever and wherever they wanted.  I felt happy being so present in the moment watching them and not being distracted by anything else.  I say many prayers to myself when I have taken the time to be fully present with my children- usually it is me thanking God for not letting me miss this moment.  We never know which moments are going to be the memories that we remember, so may we all be as present as possible.

I was lucky enough to capture this moment of my kids playing at a park

St. Patty's Day

I decided to actually put in some effort this year for St. Patrick's Day- nothing fancy like you see on pinterest, but tried to make it fun for the kiddies.  I had the kids come up with their own trap for the leprechaun.  It was interesting to see how they each took on the role of what their natural strength was.  Keia is the most creative and she came up with how to trap the leprechaun (she already knows that the little Irish guy has big curly hair and goes by mom).  Mattix built the maze with legos and Kalli, my little artist, drew the rainbow, pot of gold, and the shamrocks.  I loved watching them synergize and come up with the ideas together.

The note on the door says to pull the sword for more gold- then the white basket was to fall on him.

Last night the leprechaun drew green mustaches on their faces, peed green pee in our toilets, turned our milk green, but did leave some clues that led to lucky charm cereal and sour green gum.

As the kids were putting their trap together I asked how this was similar to how Satan traps us.  Sometimes we are drawn to "shiny" things and don't realize it can be a trap.  We become trapped and lose sight of what is really important or even lose our agency.  The kids seemed more interested in building the trap then my super insightful discussion, maybe they will really be interested when they are teenagers :0

Sunshine

The sun has come out in Utah!  Growing up in San Diego, I love the sun.  I literally felt so happy this week.  It has been in the 40's and 50's- so I took my kids to the park everyday this week and let the sun warm my face.

It is funny how our perspective can change.  In California if the weather was 60 degrees I forced my children to wear pants and warm jackets.  The first thing I would ask them when they got home was if they were cold at school.  Today Kori went to the park in shorts in 48 degree weather.  It was a good reminder that we can see things differently- that things are not always as they seem.  We can change. It also reminded me that two people could feel two different things in the same "weather."
Unless we value the differences in our perceptions, unless we value each other and give credence to the possibility that we're both right, that life is not always a dichotomous either/or, that there are almost always third alternatives, we will never be able to transcend the limits of that conditioning.
Stephan Covey

Don't these pictures just make you happy!  Thank you for coming back sun, please stay awhile.

Happy Valentine's Day

                                                                      To my Boo:

To my kiddies:

and

                                                                    To my friends:

                                                                         To YOU:

Love

I loved this quote, because at the end of my day taking care of 4 kiddies and running my household, I don't think my boo gets my best self most days.  I think that is why I look forward to our date nights every Friday, where it is just us two and we catch up from the busy week.  Matt and I have been asked to teach the Marriage class at our church- NOT because we are experts, but honestly probably because we have been married the longest in our ward (14 years).  Most members in our church where we live are college students, just freshly married and ready to conquer the world.  They sit so close together and have that twinkle in their eye.  It has been so fun to teach this class, basically we just tell them all the things we have done wrong and ask that they don't make the same mistakes.  I feel like the overall theme is just keep trying and put in the work.  Anything worth it takes our attention, and our spouse is worth it.  More quotes to come, because I love Valentine's day- not just because of my boo, but to celebrate all the people we love in our lives.

                                          This is us...

                                          but, this is really us.

Itchy legs

This is not my leg, but it is a nice one.  I picked up running again as part of my workouts.  Every time I start to run again, I get really bad itchy legs.  Apparently it is caused by our capillaries expanding from our rapid heart beat and faster blood flow- who knew?  Once I start running more often, the itchy legs go away.  But even if I miss for a week, then I will have them for that first run.  I'm itching myself just thinking about it.  Anywho- yesterday during my "itchy legs" run, which lasts about 5 mins, I wanted to scream and just run off the treadmill.  However, I know that once the itchiness goes away, then I feel a major runner's high and feel like I could run for miles.  How many of us are giving up when it starts to itch, without waiting it out for the awesome high afterwards?  I think about how many times I don't want to go out of my comfort zone, so I can avoid having "itchy legs", even if it only lasts 5 mins in a 30 min run.  The more we push ourselves out of our comfort, the greater the reward.  None of us on this Earth were meant to be mediocre, not when we were designed after God.  So...Push yourself and go get your legs itchy!

We bought a House!

This is a picture of the model home we are getting built here in Utah.  When Matt and I drove here to Utah from California, I was driving alone in Matt's car and feeling really scared about our move.  I started to see the mountains of Utah and the song "Home" came on by Phillip Phillips.  I felt like Heavenly Father was singing the song right to me, tears started streaming down my face and I knew in that moment that God would help Utah to feel like my home.  I don't know how long it will take, but I have faith it will happen.  Today the song came on again, the day we signed papers for our new home.  I hadn't heard it since the Summer while driving here.  Once again, I blasted it and let the tears fall down my face.  I know this new home is a step in the right direction.

Home

Hold on to me as we go
As we roll down this unfamiliar road
And although this wave is stringing us along

Just know that you are not alone,
Cause I'm gonna make this place your home.

Settle down, it'll all be clear
Don't pay no mind to the demons
They fill you with fear
The trouble- it might drag you down
If you get lost, you can always be found

Just know you're not alone
Cause I'm gonna make this place your home.